Personal pep talk

I think a lot of people take time to think about the past during the holidays. It is natural to think about special memories, remember someone who is no longer living, and consider the many ways life has changed.

Last year I spent time thinking about how our life had changed from 2005 to 2006 with the addition of Lindy. I documented some of my feelings in this post. That post was meant to encourage my friends who were so discouraged and disappointed that they hadn't brought home their special family member. They were struggling and oh how I could empathize. Thankfully, most of the friends I wrote this for have their sweet children and are experiencing joy beyond measure. Congratulations Di, Jill, and Shauna! Also, I couldn't be happier for you Heather and Kim. Even though I didn't know you last year, I know it was a disappointing Christmas for you and your families, as well. This Christmas, though, will be magical for all of you!!!

Now, I must read the words I wrote and BELIEVE them all over again. I do. I know God has a plan and purpose. I hold to that. I see it everyday when I look into Lindy's eyes and hold her close to me. Although I don't think we will have our daughter in 2008 or 2009, I know God knows when it will happen and that gives me peace.

The proverbial clock is now on

Today I was getting antsy. It has been more than a month since we were DTC, so I emailed our social worker to find out if she'd heard anything about a log-in-date (LID). I didn't really want to do that because I have prided myself on being the "calm client" who flies under the radar and shows full faith the agency will let us know when there is something to report. However, I did it anyway. Ironically, I got this email this afternoon:

Dear Families,

Congratulations! We have your log-in date (LID) today and the exact date is 11/7/07. As of now we are seeing the wait time to be about 25 months from LID to referral. You can find more updated information on the CCAA website.

I hope this finds you well and congratulations on accomplishing another milestone in your adoption journey!

Honestly, I had hoped our LID would be in October but it really matches our experience with Lindy--DTC 4/15/05 and LID 5/9/05. Our LID with Lindy was around her birthday (unbeknownst to us at the time) but, sadly, we're pretty sure our next daughter wasn't born in 2007 and have doubts she'll even be born in 2008.

Nonetheless, this is not a time to be melancholy and ultra-reflective. It is a happy post for now we know the "clock" is on and we are "officially" waiting and the date on the calendar tells me we're one month down.

Please pray big prayers for us and all the other waiting families. We sure could use them!