Make Room For Mei Mei

...and now the rest of the story...

2012-01-20T11:19:00.002-06:00

In my post on January 4th, I shared the story of the call that ended our Taiwan adoption journey. Today, I'm going to finish the story. So in memory of legendary radio host Paul Harvey, "and now the rest of the (too long for radio) story..."

I've had many painful, "why this, " and "why me" moments in my life but I really think this one took the prize for being the most hurtful and devastating.

The days and nights following that call on January 4th were terrible. Not only was I was in the process of telling loved ones we were moving in a few weeks, getting a house ready to put on the market, and fretting about all the unknowns of the new year, I now carried the grief of losing a child of my heart. Few know this but our Taiwanese baby was not the first child of our heart we had lost. Seven months earlier, we had lost another child we thought was intended to be our daughter. I cannot write about her but losing her was not easy emotionally. Two times we stepped out in faith and waited and endured (Taiwan MUCH longer than the other situation) and two times we were told, "no." Two "miscarriages"of the heart were more than I thought I could bear.

Don and I were certain our adoption journey was over. Done. Finished. In some ways it made perfect sense. God knew we had reservations about being older parents, the ever-growing age gap between Lindy and her unknown sister, and now concerns about how we could possibly pay for an adoption along with the move to a much more expensive area. We weren't sure why we had been taken on a roller coaster ride of epic proportions since April 2007 (when we started the process) if the answer was inevitably, "no." We weren't sure why he'd allow us to spend so much (unrecoverable) money on a process that didn't result in helping one of His own. We weren't sure why the brain surgery in 2004 that had finally gotten us off the fence and led us to pursue adoption was now the event keeping us from being parents again. The whys definitely outweighed what we felt sure of during those days but we were sure we were getting off the ride.

Since we were no longer on the journey and in the throes of packing and decluttering we gave away almost 16 bins of clothing, shoes, and baby stuff to those who could benefit. I remember touching each outfit, remembering my sweet Lindy in it, and trying to push out the pain of the hope I had felt of seeing another raven-haired daughter running around in it. I also remember feeling the sting of how time had gone so quickly with Lindy and how I'd hoped for another chance. The grief was tremendous. In fact, as I write I'm weeping because it still feels terribly real and my heart aches for those who've also suffered this loss and for those who will.

I wasn't getting out or socializing much at that point mainly because I was so busy at home preparing for our move but I also wasn't feeling too festive, either. Besides family, my biggest source of support was my friend, Elissa. Whether it was a dozen roses on my doorstep, a call, or an email, she KNEW from experience what I was going through and was equipped to minister to me in a special way.

I consented to breakfast at our favorite meeting place on Thursday, January 20th, one year ago today. During our extended visit we shared tears, anger, and laughter. Elissa didn't really like my message of being finished with our journey. She reminded me God detests the idea of orphans more than I do and told me if God wanted us to be parents again, He'd bring our child to us. I really tried to not be cynical and faithless and shoot her well-meaning words down but here were my thoughts:

1. Yeah, right.
2. How's that going to happen? If I get pregnant for the first time ever at this age that would be cruel and wrong.
3. I'm pretty sure the stork doesn't deliver.
4. I'm not lookin'. Period. End of subject.

The irony is that not only had Elissa suffered from a miscarriage of the heart when the Nepal program suddenly closed in 2009 (on MY birthday, no less), Elissa had thought they didn't have any viable options available to them but God had other plans for them when (through me, a totally frowned on sidebar conversation in MOPS, and a forwarded email), He brought Hope to them.

I don't know what time it was when we finally left our booth but I went home and decided there wasn't enough time to do something industrious like get rid of all the recipes I tear out of magazines or dust, so I did what anyone would do, get on the computer. Did I mention I hadn't been feeling very social? I really don't think I'd been on Facebook much (or at all) since the "call." I decided to take a quick peek and see what was happening in the world of social networking and that is when IT happened.

I am sure the Facebook "newsfeed" has changed 100 times since that day but at that time I think you saw EVERY friend's status, as well as every website or group you were a fan of or liked. I used to scroll back to see what I had missed but I was WAY too behind to do that. So, all I did was start with the feed that popped on my screen. That's when I saw her. That's when I felt electricity and a sensation close to that of January 25, 2006. That's when I laughed out loud and said, "Who is she?" That's when I saw a postage stamp-sized picture of the happiest little girl only to find it was OUR agency announcing the launch of their new special needs/waiting children photo site. I clicked on the link, requested a password, and before I knew it I was searching their site, and subsequently requesting the file of the adorable little face I'd felt that spark over.

I am sure I set off bells and whistles at our agency when I requested the information because they pretty much knew they were about to lose us as clients. I also remember I had to run and get Lindy from school. However, RIGHT before I had to leave I got into her file and discovered her nickname was "Mei Mei" and her first name was ACTUALLY Mei. I remember saying, "Really, God, really?" As you can tell by the name of this blog, "Mei Mei" is what we had called our little lady. I know that's pretty normal and not original because it means, "little sister" or "little girl" but we really had not (officially and collectively) chosen a name for her. I did know I wanted to use Mei and had always thought it'd be cool if Mei was part of her name but I had never encountered a child from China with that name. (I'm sure there are some I just wasn't aware of any.) I also remember thinking I was not in the business of looking for signs anymore and in NO WAY was I going to get bogged down with these details. I just wanted to look at her and find out about her because she was so stinkin' cute.

As I read her file, I did not feel fear. I believe I had the peace that passes understanding. I think it is important to document that during our long wait I had requested files of other waiting/special needs children. In honesty, I had tried to "make" myself feel love for other children and when I read files, watched videos, and saw photographs, I felt fear. I did not feel the assurance that I was meant to be their mom. I wanted to but I didn't. I never quite understood that and suffered from silent guilt as a result.

I know this is the longest story but I think it is an important one to document for our family and today felt like a fitting day.

When Don came home from work that night I was an emotional mess. I think I was an emotional mess most of last year but I remember as he washed the dishes (love that man!) I told him about my breakfast with Elissa and then about the adorable little girl called Mei Mei. I remember asking in tears, "Why am I looking at children and requesting files? We are through. We are not in a position to consider a special needs child with all we have on our plates." His answer, in typical Don fashion was, "I don't know why you're looking at files." I was thinking he might say, "You're grieving darling. You don't want to close this chapter of our lives..." Oh, wait, that's my own self-dialogue writing scripts of what others should say.

I continued to think about Mei Mei all evening and into the next day. That Friday, I received a call from the supervisor of the Asian program at our agency sort of fishing about our interest (because we had told her we weren't interested in anything 10 days earlier) and informing us about the program. She explained that they had her file and had been tasked with matching her with a family. She also explained their committee would meet at the end of the month and they would consider all the interested families and make a choice. She made it very clear people were already lining up for Mei Mei and we needed to make it known ASAP (like no later than the beginning of the week) if we wished to be considered. She mentioned one of the hugest considerations for the committee would be who could get Mei Mei home the fastest. It was then she told us some very shocking and pivotal news:

OUR DOSSIER HAD NOT BEEN PULLED FROM CHINA (as requested two years earlier when we moved to the Taiwan program)!!! WE WERE STILL LOGGED IN! For those not familiar with the lingo, it meant we were still in line, waiting for a child in the eyes of China. Furthermore, we were current on everything else because we recently and begrudgingly had just shelled out lots of money to update our fingerprints and a home study.

I tried to remember all the details so I could relay them to Don. I recall giving him all the information and trying to spark conversation but it just didn't really go anywhere. He wasn't saying, "no." He just wasn't saying anything. Meanwhile, I could not get her sweet smile out of my head...

Fast forward to Tuesday morning. As I drove the 14-17 minute commute to Ladies Bible Class, I decided to call and check in with my mom. During that brief call I told her about Mei Mei and how I could not get her out of my heart or mind and that the feeling I felt for her was pretty much "love at first sight." She basically told me she didn't understand and was under the impression we were through and moving (literally) on. I remember feeling short and frustrated and telling her I didn't expect her to understand. It is imperative to note my mom was being very protective of my heart. She has had to pick up the pieces over and over and glue them back together and I know she was thoroughly confused and surprised by my revelation. At that point I had to go or I was going to be late.

Normally after class I would go have lunch with my friend, Ashleigh. However, for some reason I didn't that day. I went straight home and not long after I got home I got a call from my mom. I don't remember her words but the essence of the message was that she loved me and would support whatever decision I (we) make. I asked her if she wanted to see why I was so smitten and she said, "yes." I immediately sent the little pictures and thanks to some high speed internet, she opened them right away. You would have to know my mom to fully appreciate what ensued. I recall there was a REALLY goofy, giddy, girlish giggle (how's that for amazing alliteration) and then she said something like, "Would you look at her? That's her. That's our Millie Mei. She belongs in our family. I know it." There were some tears of joy and excitement. I went on to share all I knew about her, the process, and the urgency of taking action if we wanted to pursue her.

I strongly believe her reaction and blessing helped me have the courage to tell Don what I was feeling and thinking. It is not easy for me to say what I want. I often don't really have a preference but the more I thought about Mei Mei and prayed about it, the more I knew I would always regret if we didn't at least put our names in the hat. If we didn't get chosen, then we would know God had spoken again, accept His answer, and keep on going.

I nervously told Don my desires and he said, "Okay. I'm good with that." What? That simple? Yep. That simple.

Well, we asked our agency to consider us, prayed for several days, and at the end of January discovered we had been chosen to be Mei Mei's parents. As you know, that Mei Mei became our Millie Mei on October 10, 2011.

After three months, she still seems foreign to us at times but when I look at her I can't miss that she is a living, breathing testament to God's faithfulness to us and our family. Every time we wanted to blow off having fingerprints done or getting a medical exam, or having another social worker come visit, something held us there and told us to keep going. We signed and had a letter notarized asking China to withdraw our dossier but it didn't happen. I hadn't been on Facebook but got on at that moment and saw her on the page. I could have missed that but I didn't. God's fingerprints are all over this story. I even see His fingerprints when I think about all the stuff we gave away. The only stuff we had to pass down to her was what still fit Lindy last year and/or what was still in her drawers and closets. Everything else was gone (except for the stuff a couple of stubborn friends gave back). Well, Millie is a BIG girl. She'll be three in a month but she's 33 pounds and wearing size 4T and a size 8 or 9 shoe. I literally take it out of Lindy's closet because it is too short and basically put it right on Millie or in her closet. Thank you, God, for your provision in these tighter economic times. More than that, thank you for your faithfulness!

Millie is asking me for lunch. It is time. It is also time for me to end this story. So I'll sign off in a non-original way. "And now you know the rest of the story."

Three months with Millie Mei

2012-01-10T14:17:00.001-06:00

Three months ago today we became the parents of this sweet little girl. It is weird how time is so deceptive. In many ways, I can't believe it has already been three months and in other ways I can't believe it has only been three months. What is that strange paradox?

I remember wishing so many people could experience Lindy like I experience(d) her and I feel exactly the same way about Millie. I can't begin to explain her. She is probably the most loving child I've ever come in contact with and she is oh so grateful. She craves love and gives it freely. Again, I find myself being humbled and learning--often painful--lessons of obedience, grace, patience, gratitude and a million other things.

I could go on and on telling you about her but I hear her whimpering upstairs as she doesn't really seem to be napping today. :( I also have to use my energies writing about her on her three month post placement report--due tomorrow.

January 4, 2011

2012-01-04T11:09:00.000-06:00

"In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice.
In the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." Psalm 5:3

Hi! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! Perhaps I'll get to sharing some pictures later. I am chronically behind.

This morning as I was "getting ready" (and I DO use the phrase loosely), I was transported to January 4, 2011. I almost remember it like it happened yesterday. I was blow drying my hair and praying, earnestly praying, for God to give me something that day about our stalled Taiwan adoption. It was a new year, the first day back in the routine, I knew we were embarking on a huge change with an impending move, and I really wanted to know what was going to happen with our wait for our next daughter, so I asked.

I proceeded to take Lindy to school, go to the store to restock our bare refrigerator shelves and pantry, and get things accomplished with a new energy that seemed to accompany the new year (that I'd love to have today).

I got back from the store and checked my email and found one from our case worker with our adoption agency. It said our file had been reviewed by the organization in Taiwan and they had concerns about my medical history and she needed to speak with us immediately. I think I was so happy to hear our file was finally being reviewed for a potential match that I didn't pick up on the tone of the message. I quickly responded and attached medicals (they already had) and an optimistic let's just talk this thing through.

At 11:11 a.m., I got a call from our agency that permanently changed our life. Can I just tell you for dozens of years I've always been convinced in a very non-superstitious way that something really bad or really good would happen for me at that time? My case worker informed us the organization in Taiwan didn't want or need any clarification on my medicals. They were turning us down. The pre-approval we'd obtained exactly two years earlier was now worthless. We now had a failed adoption to add to our list of life experiences and we were absolutely devastated and heartbroken. I had asked for God to give me something that day and He delivered in a way I didn't expect or think I wanted.

I will share more of the story and ensuing days later. However, today I just want to remind you that when you ask God for something, you really need to be prepared for Him to answer. I realized that day I was extremely surprised He delivered an answer so quickly. That's kind of a sad and fairly faithless testimony to think I was pretty shocked that God--the creator of this universe--would give an answer of such magnitude in a span of less than five hours. I believe He wants us to ask but I also believe He wants us to trust that He will answer us. Second, and probably more obvious, the answer might not always be what you want but it is what He KNOWS is best for us. Being lavished with smooshy kisses and hugs as I attempt to type this post, totally substantiates that!

Blessings in this new year!!!

Lisa

Sweet sisters

2011-11-21T15:15:00.001-06:00

I've had a lot of people ask how things are going with the sisters. I've been wanting to do this post for a while but I wasn't sure whose blog to put it on (Millie's, Lindy's, or the family blog). Just another reason I need to merge the three. It is on the list of things to do.

Things are going EXCEPTIONALLY well with the Osborn sisters.

I had worried there would be some jealousy, bossiness, and attention hogging on Lindy's part when we got home. Afterall, Lindy had 5 1/2 years as an only child and has never lacked for attention. I had picked up on some jealous statements before we brought home Millie and was worried the green-eyed monster was making its way into her heart and mind. However, if I can just take a moment and brag I just can't put into words how proud I've been of Lindy. She welcomed Millie with an open heart and arms and has not only been loving, sweet, and mature about her new sister, but she has also been proactively helpful--so much so that I have to watch that she does not think she's the mommy. She is quite patient with her and also very nurturing.

EVERY once in a while I see some jockeying for attention but overall she's been fantastic. I also have to keep reminding her that Millie is only two and does not understand everything she is saying to her and that two year olds don't know how to engage in a lot of interactive play. We've been reading Beezus and Ramona together and she can relate to the story fairly well. God really did a great job answering our prayers in preparing her for her new role and we are so thankful to him for how he equipped her.

Millie came to us knowing Lindy was her big sister--jie jie in Chinese--and upon meeting her at the airport Millie couldn't wait to pull out her picture album and show off all the pictures of Lindy. It was stinkin' cute. Although she's never told me, judging by what I've been witnessing, I think Millie is a pretty big fan of her big sister. Millie might've been the queen bee where she came from and it doesn't appear she was wanting for attention. We just don't know what the dynamic was and how she fit in. Initially, Millie seemed to be a bit more volatile with Lindy. Some days she squealed with delight when she'd see Lindy in the morning or we'd pick her up from school and then other times she didn't want to play with her, give or receive affection from her, she was mean-spirited and aggressive toward her, and she definitely did not want her help in any capacity. We've made significant strides over the past several days and Millie seems much more accepting of Lindy's help and seems to be much nicer to her on a consistent basis.

Millie knows we're not going to tolerate swatting, biting, screaming, or being mean. I hear her repeating, "Lindy help" and "love Lindy," so I think it is coming together in her mind. She mimics everything Lindy does and cannot wait to pick her up in the afternoon. We meet Lindy in the library at the school and she about tackles her when she sees her and definitely does not greet her in hushed tones.

Lest you think it is all roses, there are moments of impatience, copying, tattling, being territorial, and other typical things. However, they really are pretty few and far between considering they've been together just a month today and both have pretty big personalities.

I know there will probably be seasons where they don't like each other but I really hope there will be a time when they are the best of friends and that they will always love one another.

Getting to you know her; getting to know all about her...

2011-11-17T12:32:00.000-06:00

It's a very ancient saying,
But a true and honest thought,
That if you become a teacher,
By your pupils you'll be taught.


As a teacher I've been learning -- You'll forgive me if I boast -- And I've now become an expert, (Not really; not yet!) On the subject I like most.

Getting to know you,
Getting to know all about you.
Getting to like you,
Getting to hope you like me.

Getting to know you,
Putting it my way,
But nicely,
You are precisely,
My cup of tea.

Getting to know you,
Getting to know all about you.
Getting to like you,
Getting to hope you like me.

Getting to know you,
Putting it my way,
But nicely,
You are precisely,
My cup of tea.

Getting to know you,
Getting to feel free and easy
When I am with you,
Getting to know what to say

Haven't you noticed
Suddenly I'm bright and breezy? (Um, not exactly!!!)
Because of all the beautiful and new
Things I'm learning about you
Day...by...day.

--From the "King and I"--Richard Rodgers

This little tune sums up the way--for the most part--things are going around here this week. I'm by no means an "expert" and am definitely not "bright and breezy" yet.

Last week I was in the throes of being schooled by Miss Millie Mei and it was pretty tough. I was overwhelmed, frustrated, and exhausted. Things I thought worked, backfired. She threw curve balls right and left. Nothing seemed to work. There was absolutely NO WAY I could have busted out in this song at any point and, if you know me, you know I love a good show tune!

This week has been going significantly better. I think there are many things I can chalk it up to but I will admit I've been thinking a lot about what it says in Lamentations 3:22-23: "Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."

I love that every day God gives us a fresh start with new opportunities. I love that we also are given a choice to look at things in a positive or negative manner. After a couple of uplifting talks with friends who've walked this path, our first post placement visit with our social worker, encouraging notes and words from friends and family, prayer, and some internal pep talks, I've been trying to have more peace in the process of getting to know Millie. Who knows, maybe one day I'll be able to bust out in this song like Deborah Kerr (or is it Carr?) and really be "bright and breezy" because I am an "expert" on all things Millie Mei.

xo~
Lisa

Our first month with Millie Mei

2011-11-10T06:30:00.234-06:00

I truly can't believe we have had Millie for a month. In many ways, it really just seems like we met her. I guess in other ways we are still "meeting" her. Since about 3/4 of the time we have been together has not been our true "new normal," we are really only about one week into trying to get settled into our new routine. I've contemplated and struggled about what to write for this post. I will write the truth. The first month has been one of emotional highs and joyful, happy moments but it has also been one of sobering, exhausting lows. Isn't that really parenthood in a nutshell, though?

Millie is a very sweet and sensitive child. She is well-behaved and extremely loving and affectionate. Her kisses are big, long, and sloppy and her hugs are so tight and she never wants to let go. She is quick to say, "I love you" and I know she knows what it means and means it. Having all that by now from a child her age is such a blessing! Millie has shown she can be very happy like all the handful of pictures we'd seen of her before we met her. She is a teaser and a ham with a multitude of crazy facial expressions.

She is also smart as a whip. That's a weird expression. Who deemed whips smart, or tacks for that matter? Weird expressions aside, she is smart. She is soaking up English like crazy and I know it won't be long until she is getting in her 10,000 words by noon in English.

She is also 32 months old and she lives up to every bit of her age at times. Thankfully, tantrums are few and far between and her stubborn side is usually short-lived with a bit of redirection or correction. She is also, at times, very emotional or on the opposite end she goes into these moments of what I would call despondency. Either the crying or vacant, faraway look can come on without warning and I don't think I've ever felt more helpless. I believe it is grief on some level and it is heart wrenching to watch as I just.don't.know.what.to.do! I pray these moments will go away in time.

I thought I had done a lot of thinking, praying, and preparation before Millie came home but I will admit the area that has been the biggest struggle for me is that I don't know Millie and she really seems foreign to me. (I'm not at all talking about the Chinese part; although, there are times I wish I knew what she was saying because I think it'd be funny or I'd find out she has a mouth like a sailor.) Somehow, whether it was ignorance or arrogance, I skipped over this part the process. I am embarrassed that I missed the fact that it would take time for ME to get to know her and subsequently learn to parent her accordingly. I always thought of things from HER perspective of her having the challenge of getting to know us, her new surroundings, her new language, her new life, etc. However, I guess I hadn't really thought of all the time and challenges I would have in getting to know her intimately and understand her quirks, likes, and dislikes. We are in a discovery phase which is a humbling place to be. Daily, I cry out for wisdom and guidance as I try to learn to be the Mommy Millie needs, which is proving to be much different than the one Lindy needed/needs.

We are so thrilled that God has blessed us with Millie. We are also thankful for all the happy moments of love and joy we've already had with her and we look forward to so many more in the future. I am also trying to be thankful for these moments of learning and difficulty because I know this is a time of refinement and period of growth. Please pray for us to learn what God is trying to teach us.

So much to say...so little time...

2011-11-02T14:04:00.000-05:00

I am on completely borrowed time as I no longer have Sara or Don blogging for me. Sadly, I haven't had a moment to blog before now. However, it is naptime--not a fun time for Miss Millie. During our last week in China, Millie decided to boycott naps and she's been doing it ever since. I have faith she will embrace it again soon. Failure is not an option.

I am going to make this quick and then I will look for opportunities to post other things as I get more into a routine.

We have been home almost two weeks and we are doing well. Millie is an amazing, brave, bright, and beautiful little girl. She is doing great and we are so proud of her. I think every day gets a little better. When I step back and think of all she has been through since October 10th it brings me to tears. When I step back even more and think of all that I don't know that she's been through, it makes me cry harder.

Thank you to everyone who sent comments, emails, read the blog, and prayed for us while we were away. It was such an encouragement and we believe things are going so well because of those prayers! Thank you so much!

I'll keep the post short and the pictures plentiful!

Love~
Lisa

Millie's signature dance move.

She figured since Lindy has a dance named after her (the Lindy Hop), she deserves one, too.

My super sweet super stars!

Getting her spaghetti on!

No noodle is safe if Millie is around.

My pinkalicious cupcake showing off her new word, "smile."

My pumpkin!

Consulate Appointment is Done!

2011-10-19T07:52:00.000-05:00

Today was Wednesday in Guanzhou. We were up reallyearly as we had our Consulate Appointment at 8:30. We should haveMillie's visa back on Thursday in time for our return on Friday morning. When we got back from the Consulate we felt adventurous so we tried to ride theGuangzhou metro. It was a piece of cake and we went back to ShamianIsland for a little more shopping and a grilled cheese sandwich at Lucy's.

While Lisa was in one store, Don broke out some bubbles and Millie chased themaround popping them. all of a sudden she attracted about 6 or 7 peoplewith cameras who started shooting her like she was a rock star. I beleivethey were photography students who were on Shamian to photograph variousscenes. You wouldn't beleive all the models and brides getting theirpictures taken around the place. We never get tired of that place.

For dinner we went out with a family from Georgia who came to pick up two kidsfrom two separate provinces. They have seven kids total and now 5 fromChina. They seem to be beyond building their family and are all aboutrescuing orphans that have a bleak future. Very inspiring to seefaith in action.

We enjoyed the Brazilian steakhouse again as they didn'tfeel like Chinese food and were happy to get some real meat and desserts. Tomorrow is our last day in Guangzhou. We were told about a verybeautiful park that is a couple of miles from our hotel. We may try towalk over their and play around near the lake. Thanks again for theprayers and encouraging notes. Millie continues to grow closer to us eachday and we can't wait for Lindy to meet her when we get back home.

Lindy - we hope you enjoy your field trip to the farm thisweek and can't wait to hear all about it.

(on the metro)

(White Swan waterfall)

(Millie attracting the photography students)

(at dinner with a family from Georgia)

Love,

Don and Lisa

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

2011-10-18T07:52:00.000-05:00

Today we didn't have any tours until the afternoon as our guide had an annual tour guide exam in the morning. This allowed us time to sleep in for the first time and just tool around near the hotel. Millie woke up in a good mood so little spent some time singing songs with her. She likes "If you're happy and you know it" and apparently knew the tune to "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star." When Lisa sang the English version to her she picked up the words pretty quickly although I caught a few blah blahs in there. I caught the funny moments on video.

We went on a big walking trip around all the shopping malls near us. It was a little bright outside so Millie wanted to wear her sunglasses. After lunch and a nap, we went to a old school/temple. Once we were there, we realized it was a place we toured on our first visit to Guangzhou five and a half years ago. It was fun to just leisurely walk around and take in the sights. I got some additional video when Millie attracted a crowd to her as she was looking at some statues. It's pretty funny when she starts conversing with the locals in Chinese and we just sit back and watch. lots of people comment about her beautiful eyes and then I can tell they are asking where she is from. The answer Urumqi in Xinjiang province usually draws a comment about how far away that place is.

(Millie in her sunglasses!)

For dinner we went to a Mexican food place (Tekilas) that we found earlier in the day. It's always a good sign to see Mexican cook in the back and we were able to talk to the owner who is from Guadalajara. The food was really authentic and was better than the Mexican food we've had so far in Virginia. Tomorrow we're up early for our Consulate appointment and then plan to go to dinner with a family from Georgia we met in our hotel. Each day gets better and better - though bath time is marginally better. Oh well, baby steps.

Love,

Don and Lisa

Killing time in Guangzhou

2011-10-17T09:26:00.001-05:00

Well, we're still killing time in Guangzhou. We'vebeen to the zoo to see Pandas and we went back to the doctor to have Millie'sTB test read. Thankfully she passed. We've been enjoying thecivilization of Guangzhou. It seems like such a modern city with westernstyle breakfasts, bathrooms with commodes, and a soft hotel bed.

Milliecontinues to grow closer to us each day. She is picking up on a littleEnglish and seems to understand more each day. It is a little difficultwith so many Chinese speakers around that pay so much attention to her. She seems to go into ignore parents mode and avoid eye contact when we call hername. We've been enjoying various types of food around the downtown area. We've had Italian (not Pizza Hut) and Millie seems to like pizza. Weheaded to what was supposed to be Latin Mexican food however we discovered itwas really a Brazilian steakhouse so we were able to sink out teeth into meatfrom a cow. They also had a great dessert table which we haven't had at all ina week and a half.

I think Millie has gained even more weight each day asshe continues to really eat well. On Sunday she weighed in at 32 poundswhich is only a few shy of her older sister. People we meet aresurprised to learn that she is only 2 and a half. The playground atthe hotel seems like a big hit. On Tuesday we finally get to sleep in andthen head to a museum in the afternoon.

Just a couple of funny Millie stories. We've beencalling her whatever she will answer to - Mei Ting, Mei Mei, and Millie. When Lisa practices saying Millie, little miss suddenly lacks her parrotingability and repeats "Mollie." She can't seem to get the"I" sound in her name. She also struck up a conversationwith our van driver. He asked her where her home is and she replied"Far away." (Apparently the hotel living and flights havethoroughly confused her.) Anyway he asked her if her home was in Americaand she replied, "No, it's in Mongolia." Not sure if herdialect is a little off or if she's really heard of Mongolia. She makeseveryone laugh and seems top live in a world that revolves around her.

(chowing at the Brazilian Restaurant)

(A waiter at the Brazilian Restaurant)

(on the playground at the hotel)

(on the hotel playground with Mom)

(Spotting an airplane; they are still a wonder to her!)

(Shopping on Shamian Island)

(on the red couch at the White Swan)

(Millie hamming it up on the White Swan red couch)

(in front of the waterfall at the White Swan)

Well, that's all for now. We have our Consulateappointment on Wednesday and leave town early on Friday morning. Takecare and keep those notes and comments coming. They are really nice toread after being gone for a week and a half.

Thanks,

Don And Lisa

Leaving Urumqi

2011-10-15T09:55:00.001-05:00

(Millie in the hotel in Urumqi Thursday morning)

Wednesday evening, Lisa commented that we had just seen a different child. Millie was in one of the most pleasant moods and we sat around in the hotel just laughing and playing. She seems to be getting much more comfortable with us.

On Thursday, our last full day in Urumqi, we went to the International Bazaar. It is a big Uygher market where they sell all kinds of jewelry, rugs, clothes, knives, nuts, and raisins. We were expecting it to be busy but is was just right and we found it to be really interesting. Our guide rushed us a little because she needed to pick up Millie's passport at the end of the day.

(at the International Bazaar)

On Friday we left Urumqiamong tight security as a flight the day before from Beijing to Urumqi wasdiverted because of a bomb scare. Our guide got us there several hoursearly just to be safe. We were about ready to leave Urumqi behind so wedidn't mind. Millie loved sitting at the airport watching planes go by. She got really excited when she could see them rotate and take off. Shewas pretty cool on the plane until the pilot banked just shortly after takeoffand she saw the ground whizzing by below us. That kind of spooked her fora little bit. Fortunately, lunch is always a favorite and she scarfeddown some noodles.

At the Urumqi Airport

(Millie, striking up a conversation with a cleaning lady! Showing her pictures of her family back home :))

She waspretty good on the 5-hour flight to Guangzhou until we started descending atwhich time she freaked a little again. Hopefully, she will be old hat bythe next time we fly, which will be home.

We got to Guangzhou and werepleasantly surprised by how nice the Garden Hotel is in person. It lookednice but it is really something else plus they put us in a suite which is,well, Sweet. The Trade Fair is going on in Guangzhou so the city is crazywith people from all over the world.

On Friday, we knocked out themedical appointment and the US visa picture. We were able to walk aroundShamian Island and stroll through the streets and do a little shopping. It's a little slower with the White Swan closed for renovations but still acool place. We'll be back there on Monday to have Millie's TB test readand do some more shopping.

On Sunday, we're headed to the zoo for a fewhours and will basically just look around the hotel area, which is full ofshops.

(there were apples on the living room table at The Garden)

(this is what happens when Millie gets her head wet!)

(at the medical clinic on Shamian Island)

Millie continues to be a great kid. She isoccasionally moody but is really good the majority of the time. She sayshi to everyone and strikes up all kinds of conversations to anyone speakingChinese. We're learning a few more words to try to communicate. Wesee the typical two year old on occasion but we can usually get through thatpretty quickly.

Apparently she likes Taylor Swift as she started singingand dancing when one of her videos came on TV today. She is a really goodimpersonator and mimics all kinds of words and actions. We had Pizza inan Italian restaurant and she watched both of us eat our pizza so she wouldknow how to do it. She continues to eat everything in sight. We love to sit and play with her and she loves to make us laugh. So fartickle spots and funny faces are working for us.

(lunch at the Thai restaurant)

(walking around the area by the hotel)

(Playground at the hotel)

That's all for now. Thanks for your continuedcomments, emails, and prayers. We feel blessed so far.

Don and Lisa and Millie

A visit to the orphanage (with pictures!)

2011-10-12T10:35:00.002-05:00

(Millie Mei in the hotel)

On Wednesday we had the opportunity to go visit theOrphanage in Urumqi. It is actually two places as there is adowntown branch and the main site out past the airport. When we arrived,little miss rock star took over. The teachers (nannies) all ran toher and picked her up and passed her around. She saw a little boy thatshe used to play with and immediately started bossing him around. Itwas obvious that she didn't lack for attention - rather she was probablypretty spoiled. We believe she moved to the downtown brancha few months ago as it houses kids over 2. Her teacher/foster mom wasvery nice and we toured the room where she lived. We found out sheloves grapes and she downed quite a few. She also likes what theycalled biscuits (shortbread cookies) and ate two packages of those. All of this was about an hour after breakfast.

We then drove out tothe main orphanage which was a very nice place. We weregreeted by two teachers who immediately carted Millie around. Theytold us she was one of the leaders there which I think was code for bossy. We were initially told she lived there but later found out shelived in a foster home nearby up until a few months ago. I thinkthe trip set us back a little in bonding because of all the attention shegot from her teachers which caused her to reject mom and dad a little. However, that was all over once we got in the van back to town. It was good to see the place and to find out more about her. Ibelieve some pictures from the last two days should make their way ontothis post.

She sure is a cute thing. We'll work on the temperand bonding as we go along but we think that it is going better than weexpected with a two and a half year old. We're definitely ready toget home but will keep playing the Chinese waiting game for another week anda half. We leave for Guangzhou on Friday.

(At the orphanage visit)

Hopefully thecomputer situation will improve there as I know where there are internet cafes.

Lots of love to family and friends. Thanks Grandmaand Grandpa for the updates on Lindy. It's comforting to know she isfine until we return.

Take care for now.

Tuesday

2011-10-12T08:26:00.001-05:00

Tuesday was a pretty relaxing day here. In themorning, we just ate breakfast in the hotel and tried to load up on a few ofthe known foods - eggs, toast, noodles, and juices. Most ofthe breakfast buffet is unknown quantities which we try to limit sinceyou never know what type of bathroom will be around if you need it. We walked around near the hotel which is quite an unusualexperience. Around the corner is a street full of vendors and lots of people. There are a lot of Uyghers who bring out little grills and fire uproasted corn, meats, and all kinds of things. We usually draw lotsof stares and comments which we have no idea what they are saying.

In the afternoon we went to the Provincial Museum which details the historyof Western China. Urumqi is along the Silk Road so that bringslots of things. The nearby desert preserved quite a few mummies datingback 2000-3000 years which were found recently.

Millie was a trooper. She is still pretty headstrongso it's a little bit of a battle trying to manage behavior when alleyes are on you. She seems to be afraid of men and shopping carts andscreamed her head off when we rinsed her hair during her bath. Welater found out that those are three things the nannies told us she didn'tlike.

Since Daddy is a man we're still trying to work our in. We also found out that the girl can shovel the food in. She canhandle a fork as well as chop sticks but pretty much likes to put her mouthnear her plate and shove it in. We'll definitely have tolimit her so she doesn't overeat. Bedtime has gone well and she goesto sleep within about 15-30 minutes of going down.

Wednesday we are headed to visit the Orphanage and try tofind out more about Millie. Hopefully we'll get lots of info. Thanks for all your prayers and notes.

Gotcha Day

2011-10-10T06:48:00.000-05:00

Well we have Millie. I know everyone just wants tosee pictures but we are using the hotel business center and our pictureresolution is too hi to upload. I'll change the settings in onecamera and get some photos uploaded soon.

We went to the Provincial center on Monday at aout 10:30. As we drove up a lady from the orphanage was also arriving withMillie so we got to see her right away and ride with her in the elevator upto the ninth floor. She knew we were mama and baba as shehad seen the picture book we sent. She was beautiful and was inpretty good spirits. She allowed Lisa to hold her but was afraidof Don. She has a little temper and will let you know when she isn't happyalthough she doesn't fight too long and chills out pretty quickly. She is quite a talker, is very determined when she wants to seesomething, and is very neat and orderly. She is potty trainedwhich is nice but she will only tell you she needs to go so we quickly hadto learn to recognize that Chinese phrase.

Overall the day waslong as we completed all adoption paperwork and applied for herpassport. Now we get to relax for a few days, bond with her, and wait forpassport pickup on Friday in order to head to Guangzhou. Today (Tuesday) we are relaxing at the hotel and then going out thisafternoon to tour a museum. Urumqi is a very interesting place with allthe various cultures.

Thanks for all the emails. I'massuming there are some

blog comments but Blogger seems to be blocked here. Off to work on smaller pictures.

Don

Urumqi

2011-10-09T06:47:00.000-05:00

Well we finished up in Beijing and headed on to Urumqi. It was about 4.5 hours away by air to the Northwest part of China. When we landed it was pouring rain and about 48 degrees. The hotelwas supposed to be only about 30 minutes from the airport but with trafficand rain it took 2.5 hours. Oh well. We're here and getMillie at 10am on Monday morning.

Can't wait.

We made it to Beijing

2011-10-08T09:48:00.002-05:00

Ni hao from Beijing! We made it to Beijing onFriday with no problems. We were able to get a fairly decent night'ssleep and filled up on a good breakfast before hitting the traffic and sightsof Beijing. Last time we did not have a chance to see the Forbidden Cityso we were thankful to have the opportunity to visit it today with a fewthousand of our closest friends. Our guide, Sue, took more pictures of ustogether than we have had in 19 years. The area was much larger thanwe had imagined! After that, we saw a Cloisonne factory, had lunch, andthen went to the Great Wall--which we didn't know was on the itinerary again. We worked off our big breakfast and lived to tell about it. For somereason there is always a 90 year old woman climbing that gives that extra doseof inspiration or guilt. Today there were old women AND a man with oneleg climbing. Like most places of interest and history there was somevandalism on the wall. However, one of my favorite pictures of theday--although vandalism--pretty much sums how we feel.

Don is super happy because the hotel has ESPN andwe were able to watch some baseball and hear which team the Rangerswill be playing.

Tomorrow we depart Beijing and travel to thecity of Urumqi which is where Millie is. We are getting closer to ourgirl.

We miss home but feel your prayers.

We will post again when we have the chance!!!

Love~

Don & Lisa

Your gift to us

2011-09-30T07:16:00.000-05:00

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Philippians 4:6

Prior to leaving to bring home Hope this past summer, my super cool friend, Elissa, sent out a prayer itinerary to her family and friends. I thought it was a fantastic idea, so I decided to snag her idea and come up with one of our own. Imitation is a great form of flattery, right?

So, if you would, please give us the gift of prayer. It would mean so much to us.

Proposed Itinerary

Now-Pray for our health, stamina, and attitudes as we try to attend to each detail prior to the trip. Don has been away on business all week and is flying the red eye home and won't roll in until today sometime. (Can you say tired?) We have (lots of) funds to gather, bags to pack, prescriptions to be filled, paperwork to assemble, copies to be made, doctors to be contacted, notes to be sent, bills to be paid, housework to be done, etc., etc.

Please pray for us to be able to think clearly and know what needs to be done, what can be delegated, and not go crazy in the process. I'm not going to lie, I'm a stress case right now and my need for control is making me a bear. I need to breathe and have peace. I become happier as I see visible progress and things crossed off the list. Praying to see MANY more items crossed off my list in the next day.

Please pray for my parents to arrive safely (on Monday) and stay healthy as they make their way to our home to stay with Lindy.

Thursday, October 6th-Don and I are scheduled to leave at 12:39 pm. Please pray for easy goodbyes as we drop off Lindy to school, our departure to be on time, and for a very capable crew as we "fly the friendly skies" and head to China! It is supposed to be a non-stop flight, we'd like for it to stay that way.

Friday, October 7th- We are scheduled to arrive in Beijing at 2:20 pm. Based on experience, my biggest prayer is for a good night's sleep. This travel does CRAZY things to one's body.

Saturday, October 8th- We are supposed to have an opportunity to do some sightseeing--most likely in the Forbidden City, an excursion we missed last time. Prayers for a nice, relaxing day for the two of us. Having the time as just a couple is a rare commodity for us. I imagine it will not get any easier to find alone time with two children. We'd also love for our nephew, Jake, to have a super birthday!

Sunday, October 9th-Please pray for our safety as we leave Beijing and fly to Urumqi City on an airline I've never heard of. Their website says they are a "world five star airline," so I don't anticipate hanging out with cargo. It is about a six hour flight. China is a BIG country! Prayers of thanksgiving for my Grandpa as he celebrates his 86th birthday!

Monday, October 10th-MILLIE MEI DAY! We don't have a time yet but at some point during this day we will finally meet Xin Mei Ting in the Xinjiang Provincial Adoption Center. I'm not really clear but it looks like it might be our official adoption day, too. With Lindy it was "official" on the day after we met her and that is what we called our "Forever Family Day."

Lately, when I look at Xin Mei Ting's smiling face, I see a child who is so loved. She is already part of a family--just not the family God intended for her. She has fingernail polish and styled hair and is clearly given the gift of time and attention. All this brings such happiness to my waiting heart but it also brings the reality of what is going to happen on this day. A child is going to be removed from EVERYTHING familiar and placed in the arms of strangers. Please pray for Xin Mei Ting to work through this initial shock as easily as possible and for us to be strong for her and to have the wisdom to help her through her grief. Also, please pray for her foster family who loved her and is now saying, "goodbye." I imagine that little sweetheart who captured our hearts with her big smile will leave a big void in their hearts.

Tuesday, October 11th-Please pray we'll be able to have the ability to communicate with loved ones back home via some method during our trip. Sweet Sara is going to be my guest blogger (will take our emails and pictures and put them in the blog). I know there will be a very anxious BIG SISTER waiting to see her little sister but time differences and other factors can make communication a challenge. Oh, since we're talking communication, please pray we'll be able to successfully communicate with our toddler who knows Mandarin. We know the handful of words we've learned on Ni Hao Kai-Lan.

Wednesday, October 12th-We didn't see it on our itinerary but we've asked to build in time to tour the orphanage. We want to see where Millie has been for her entire life. Please pray we will be allowed to visit. Additionally, I have "met" a fellow Urumqi waiting mom and am hoping to deliver a care package to the daughter for whom she waits and take pictures of her.

Thursday, October 13th-Please pray for the three of us to have a special day as we tour Urumqi City. Please pray for continued bonding, developing trust, and for us to learn more and more about Millie.

Friday, October 14th-Happy birthday, Uncle Robbie! After we pick up essential adoption paperwork and Millie's passport in the morning, we will make our way to the airport. Oh how I wish we were heading home. However, at this point we will only be halfway through our trip. We will leave Millie's province and head to the city of Guangzhou. Please pray for our safety and an uneventful flying debut for Millie. It is about the equivalent of a coast-to-coast flight and we'll have a limited bag of tricks. Benadryl anyone? NO JUDGING! We've had more than one very fine pediatrician recommend this little cocktail. It didn't work for big sis. Let's pray it does for the little one!

I remember such a sadness and the tears I had when we left Changsha with Lindy. I anticipate I will have a similar sadness as I leave my daughter's first home. These first few days together are filled with so many bittersweet moments.

I am pretty sure my parents will be taking a road trip this weekend after Lindy gets out of school. Please pray for their safety and a lot of fun times!

Saturday, October 15th-Sleep in right? Oh no. Today we will do paperwork, have Millie's pictures taken (not for fun), and have the mandatory medical examination. Please pray for Millie's exam to go well. This exam will include a TB test and possibly some vaccinations. Please pray for her to be found healthy and pass her exam. If she doesn't, we could have an undesired extended stay. We wouldn't mind prayers for our health, too.

Sunday, October 16th-Please pray we can attend church. I think it would be an amazing opportunity and experience for many reasons.

Monday, October 17th-We will return to the medical clinic to receive the results of Millie's TB exam. Please pray for favorable news and minimal flashbacks or trauma as she sees the men and women in white coats again.

Tuesday, October 18th-Please pray for our family at home--especially for Lindy to be focusing at school and behaving well for my parents.

Also, please pray for us to have some fun family times in Guangzhou.

Wednesday, October 19th-Today is our Visa appointment at the US Consulate. Please pray all our paperwork is in good order and for this part of the process to go as smoothly as we expect.

Thursday, October 20th-Please pray for us to have a great last day in China and for our Visa package to be ready at 3:30 pm--the LAST thing we need to leave.

Friday, October 21st-AKA longest.day.ever. At about 6:00 in the morning we will leave Guangzhou to make our way via van to the airport in Hong Kong. At 11:50 our flight is scheduled to leave and the really long journey begins. Please pray for our flight to be on time and for safe travels. Also, please pray that all of us will be able to rest at some point during the flight and for Millie to be a champ.

Millie will become an American citizen during our layover in Chicago. Woo hoo!!! We will have a couple hours there and then make our way home, hopefully landing close to 7:00 pm EDT where we will do our best to get to the excited big sister and grandparents as soon as possible.

I could use your prayers for my heart. Leaving China is a bittersweet time. This time it is even more bittersweet and I pray I won't be a complete emotional wreck in my presumed broken down, hormonal, weary state of exhaustion. I already know it'll be sad to leave the land of our daughters. I think most adoptive parents have encountered that feeling on some level. The happy part is that we're coming home with the daughter we waited so long for, prayed so hard for, and many times thought we just might never have. We will have living, breathing proof of God's amazing love and faithfulness and answered prayer! However, I'm not going to lie, it is so hard for me not to be bringing Millie home to San Antonio. Although it feels like a lifetime, we will only have been gone from San Antonio for six months on October 10th. The pain of the move is still very real to me and I carry a great ache in my heart knowing that so many of the people who faithfully prayed for us and carried us these past four and a half years won't be meeting Millie and be a part of her homecoming. In some cases, the day we showed people Millie's picture was the same day we told people we were moving. I am not sharing this to sound self-absorbed, selfish, or pathetic. They are my true feelings and truth is what you get here. I'm just so grateful for the people who were by our side through the good and bad, so I know I'll be missing them a lot more on this particular day.

That is not to say that Millie won't be loved in her new home and I in NO WAY want to take away from anyone else outside of San Antonio who has been supportive of us on any part of this journey. She is, without a doubt, loved and we are so blessed and humbled knowing that.

I apologize for the very lengthy post. If we aren't able to post during our travels, you will at least be able to "picture" what we might be doing. While you're picturing us, please make sure to see me at least 10 pounds thinner, with good hair, and a cute outfit. Ha ha!!!

Thank you, in advance, for your prayers. It will bring us great peace knowing we are covered.

At long last

2011-09-23T11:35:00.000-05:00

I'm baaccckkk.

I've been a very negligent blogger. It is hard to believe that I haven't blogged (on any of our blogs) in 13 months. So much has happened during my absence. (So much has changed with Blogger and my blog is way broken!) It has been a long, hard, emotional year. The best news is that "mei mei" the reason for this blog is REAL; she has a name; she has a face; and she is almost home.

One day I will document her story. It is too long to do now but too special not to be recorded. For now, I am taking a break from packing and I want to share her beautiful face and the awesome news that in a little over two weeks we will have her in our arms and she will be our daughter forever.

We hope to be able to blog while we are in China and would love for you to follow along.

Meet Xin Mei Ting--soon to be Millie Mei Osborn.

This is the first picture I saw of her and the rest is history...

Sweet girl with a confusing, lost-in-translation dress!

Bundled for winter. Almost two years old.

Playing during summer.

Playground princess!

Pretty in pink!

I can't believe how big my 2 1/2 year old is!

Words can't express how much I love her!

Tickled pink!

What is going on???

2010-08-18T09:37:00.000-05:00

Just checked out this very neglected blog to see that my wallpaper is gone. What happened? I don't know...Maybe this blog is about to expire due to neglect and abuse...

I'll add this to the to-do list.

Oh, and by the way, we're still waiting...

The sweetness of trying to find the "perfect" name

2010-02-10T17:20:00.002-06:00

Since we've been waiting for mei mei for well over two years, one might think we'd be completely ready. We're not. One of the exciting things about having a new addition is coming up with a name.

Coming up with Lindy's name was pretty painless. There weren't any knockdown drag out fights, tears, or hurt feelings which has been known to take place in other households. Lindy is STILL really into pretend play and naming things; therefore, she has taken a great interest in what her sister's name will be. For fun, I've asked some of her suggestions. She has taken it quite seriously and usually says something like this: "Hey momma, what about _________ as a name for mei mei? Is that the perfect name? Is it? Is it? Is it?"

Here is what she's come up with lately:

1. Lulu (this has been the one she's said from the start)
2. Petal-October 2009
3. Cupcake-November 2009
4. Muffin-November 2009
5. Candycorn-November 25, 2009
6. Chippewa-November 25, 2009
7. Sprinkles-November 26, 2009
8. Lindy-November 26, 2009
9. Mei mei-January 2010
10.Sweetie-February 2010
11. Little Popcorn Pop-February 2010
12. Sugar Heart-February 2010

Based on her name selections, it sounds like we better keep our good dental insurance!

As painful as this wait has been at times, it thrills me that Lindy has maintained such an interest in her sister.

By the way, we don't have a name selected yet and I can confidently say that I don't think any of these sweet ideas will make the cut. However, we've all probably heard the urban legend of the twins named Lemonjello and Orangejello (say it together with a French sound), so you just never know...

Love with sprinkles on top~
Lisa

Disillusioned, down, discouraged, disappointed, devastated but not deserted

2010-01-12T16:55:00.002-06:00

The title of this post is how I feel regarding this journey. I'm not sure many people read this blog but I want to capture some of my thoughts on virtual paper for the future.

In late November we received some information that helped us have a bit of a clearer picture as to how many families were ahead of us (with our agency). All of a sudden, Don and I had a revival of hope and we decided to pray this baby home in 2010. We believed it could and would happen in 2010 and projects concerning a nursery for baby girl and transitioning Lindy to a new room seemed potentially more pressing than they have in the past. I felt like an expectant mother (in my third year of gestation) and was happily thinking pink. The dreaming and excitement was fun while it lasted!

Not long after our new found excitement--December 8th to be exact--we received an email from our agency which contained some very discouraging news informing us we could be looking at potential delays of six to eight months (in addition to the built in wait time). In a word, I was devastated.

We have had two group conference calls with our agency and one individual call with our case worker but we still don't have much information as it appears things are still unfolding for them. We are supposed to have another conference call in February. Bottom line is that we (along with all the other waiting families) are victims of some red tape. When you hear words and phrases like "restructure," "regroup," "examine processes," you know things can't be great. I won't bore you with all the details that we know but I don't think it is realistic that we will bring home our daughter this year.

This past month hasn't been easy for me emotionally. Everything that seemed right has now caused me pain and has me feeling disillusioned. I know God holds the answers and knows how the story goes and He wants me to trust him, no matter what. I know He hasn't deserted us, nor will He. I just wish I felt stronger and more confident about things and my ability to endure.

As I write this, I really don't know what to write. As I pray, I really don't know what to pray. I guess our prayer is really the same that we one day (sooner than later) will have a beautiful, healthy baby girl to add to our family. However, we also desire clarity and peace in the process.

Many of you who have walked the adoption journey have experienced the kind of heartbreak we're dealing with right now, others have experienced disappointment in other areas of life. No matter what your story, thank you for the support you've shown and prayers you've offered. We truly appreciate them.

I will continue to provide updates as I hear them.

Hanging on by a thin red thread~
Lisa

YIKES!!!

2009-11-27T10:13:00.003-06:00

I had a "yikes" moment a couple of days ago. Well, let's be honest, it was really more of a freak out moment. I saw a Facebook status update from a mommy who just returned from Taiwan last week with her sweet little daughter, Emily. It said something about jet lag and an almost seven month old, don't really go that well together.

Then it clicked--an almost seven month old is a six month old!!! Six month old!?!? Lindy was just a few days from being eleven months old when we met her. That's almost twice as old as a six month old (I'm awful at math, so I'm not going to bother to figure out the real number). Six months old sounds so young and little and, and, and...

BREATHE! I polled some of the other mommies who have adopted from Taiwan and most of the babies have been between five to eight months old when they've come home. Wow! That's awesome and it would be so wonderful but I skipped right over those months in the What to Expect...book and a baby that young seems so mysterious to me.

I'm not sure how old our daughter will be but I'm going to trust that no matter how old she is, that God will help us figure out our new little creature and bundle of love just like he did with Lindy.

If she is that young, looks like this momma bear will be doing some SHOPPING for smaller clothes and toys but man I hope I don't have to cart around one of those infant carriers that look so heavy and cumbersome!

September swap

2009-09-21T16:53:00.002-05:00

Accessories--that is what the swap theme was for September. Well, as a girl who appreciates HER accessories, of course she LOVES them for her future baby girl!

Katie was so sweet to send this fun stuff!

As you can see, Baby Osborn got some bows, socks, cute little comfy shoes, and some much-needed travel toiletries.

This was the last swap gift and a great way to end a fun activity that helped get me in the mindset of having a baby again and pass the time in a good way. Thanks, Katie, for your generosity.

Please keep praying for the process to progress.

August swap

2009-09-02T10:42:00.004-05:00

My monthly gift swap gifts arrived a few days ago. This month's theme was "Nursery." Well, I probably didn't give Heather much to go on as I have NO idea what mei mei's nursery will look like. I am not even sure which room she'll be living in. However, despite the fact that I didn't give any clues, Heather really blessed us!

First, one must love the pink, purple, and polka-dotted paper! I think I even have that same paper! I also loved the flocked or is it fleeced cherry blossom note card she sent--so pretty...

Here are the goodies she sent...

A precious shabby chic pink frame...Can't wait to see mei mei's face in there!!!

A wonderful pink crib sheet.
I'm pretty sure baby girl pink will be in the nursery no matter what.

A sweet bedtime book.
Ironically, I sent this to one of my swap buddies earlier.

Ballerina stickers for Lindy! So thoughtful!

Thank you, Heather, for blessing our family!

July swap ( a month later)

2009-08-12T17:00:00.004-05:00

As I mentioned in my last post, some gifts have been rolling in for mei mei...

In July the gift swap theme was playtime. Beth, who is waiting to bring home Emily, sent me an awesome box of goodies for our girl(s)...

It was as if she knew Lindy always wears a bow!

Lindy tried it out and approves

So soft and sweet

We will use this to send pictures of our family to our baby girl after referral and while we wait to bring her home

Mei mei will also be a bow wearer even sooner than Lindy was

Thanks for the wonderful gifts, Beth! Can't wait to see you bring home Emily.

June Gift Swap

2009-07-14T14:50:00.003-05:00

While we were waiting for Lindy, I got involved with a couple of Yahoo groups for other waiting families. That was kind of before the blog revolution and the onslaught of all the new social networking tools. Through those groups, I made some sweet friends and developed a wonderful support system. We even had secret pals which was so much fun!

Since our switch over to the Taiwan program, I've felt a little bit like a fish out of water. Recently, I got plugged in with a great group and am learning a lot of helpful information about the process of adopting from Taiwan.

Some of the waiting mommies decided to put together a secret pal gift swap and I didn't need anyone to twist my arm to join. I love to give. I love to receive and I figured it might help me remember this WILL happen.

The theme for June was bedtime. Mei mei got a darling footed sleeper and pink sleepsack. Mei mei wasn't the only recipient, though! I got a beautiful red thread bracelet. I wore a red thread bracelet that Don made me until the day I held Lindy for the first time. I haven't worn one this time and I'm not sure why. Now I will, thanks to Michelle's generosity and thoughtfulness.

For those of you new to my blog or unfamiliar with what I'm talking about, here is the legend of the red thread:

"An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break."

I know that each passing day the "thread" to this baby is getting shorter and my desire for her is getting stronger. One day...

Well, we prayed for a change...

2009-02-05T16:38:00.003-06:00

One of our prayers during this period of waiting has been for God to remove the obstacles in China and to significantly speed up the process. There have been times where I've just asked for to see some positive changes. In two days our dossier has been officially logged in with the CCAA for 15 months. As far as we can tell, there is no end in sight--with China, that is.

While the situation in China doesn't appear to be changing, we are changing direction and we believe God is walking before us and preparing our path for this change. We have decided to pursue adopting a baby girl from Taiwan.

I had heard of people adopting from Taiwan but felt like I couldn't get a good grasp on the process. Don and I don't come to decisions easily and once we've decided to pursue something it isn't like us to change course. I pretty much had decided Taiwan wasn't in the cards for us because I couldn't figure out much about it and our agency didn't offer it, anyway--until now.

This summer our agency took over several Taiwan cases for an agency that went under. At that time, my interest was piqued but they weren't actually saying they were going to open a program. I expressed an interest but wasn't sure it would result in anything and guarded my heart from being too optimistic about it. After getting acquainted with the way things work and having a chance to develop some in-country contacts, our agency decided to begin offering a Taiwan program.

After some initial fact gathering and phone calls with the Taiwan caseworker, we took the steps to become pre-approved. On January 6th we received our pre-approval and were given the green light to proceed.

We just got our updated home study today and now have to make some changes with our immigration paperwork to let the U.S. know we'll be going to Taiwan instead of China. Once we have that completed, we will send our paperwork to Taiwan and do what we do best--wait...

Currently, the estimated wait time until referral is 12-18 months (which could increase). After we receive our referral we expect we will travel four to six months later. While it still seems so far away, this wait time feels more manageable and tolerable.

We have also decided to withdraw our dossier from China. We believe this child will be our last child. If for some reason this adoption doesn't work out, we are so blessed with our darling Lindy.

I have some sadness knowing that our next daughter isn't from mainland China but am excited to get to learn about Taiwan. One of my first questions was, "Well, how do they say little sister in Taiwan?" I was excited to learn that the answer is, "mei mei" since the most commonly spoken language is Mandarin. Already, I am trying to process the differences between how things are handled regarding the adoption process.

In the past few weeks we have gone from sorely discouraged, to cautiously optimistic, to hopeful excitement. As is typical of the adoption process, we've experienced quite the rollercoaster of emotions.

So again (or still), we ask for your prayers. As my dear friend Diana reminded me this week we have a God who deals with details and wants us to be specific with Him, so here are our specific requests:

Please ask for the necessary changes to our immigration paperwork to go smoothly and quickly so that we can have our paperwork in Taiwan within the next few weeks.
Please be pray for God to provide financially for this adoption. It is significantly more expensive and during these terrible economic times we specifically ask for Don to remain gainfully employed.
Please pray for the birth parents. It is possible we will get to meet our daughter's birth mother which is a lot to think about given the contrast to our experience with Lindy. However, we pray that the birth parents are healthy and that the birth mother will make wise choices to take care of this little one before she is born.
Please pray for us to be patient and to look for ways to enjoy the wait and find the joy in the journey. God has given us a beautiful daughter, already, and I want our last months/years as a family of three to be special.

Thank you for those of you who have been praying already, for those who have expressed concern, and been faithful followers of our journey. We appreciate your love and expressions of encouragement more than you know.

A dozen months down...

2008-11-07T05:43:00.005-06:00

Hard as it is for me to believe, today our dossier for the child we affectionately refer to as, "mei mei" has been logged in one year. The other day my friend Diana asked me if the time has gone fast or slow. In all honesty, the time has flown by. It seems like no sooner had I written an update on this blog marking and trying to celebrate a month down, it was time to write another update. (Yep, I missed last month. There are only about two or three readers of this blog, so I figured they'd understand.) Life is whizzing by and I am often reminded of the words of a hymn I sung growing up, "Swiftly we're turning life's daily pages, swiftly the hours are turning to years..." So, it would seem like the fact that time is going by quickly would be cause for celebration. I have to be honest; it isn't. The fact that time is going by so quickly is also what pains me.

Please understand, I don't mean to be morbid, pessimistic, or sound terribly pathetic. I am a realist whose emotions run very deep and often very differently than those around me. The reality is that with each passing day, the face of our family changes as well as the dynamic I had hoped for. For example, Lindy is getting older--in fact she'll be three and a half years old TOMORROW. My hopes for two little girls about three years apart give or take is more realistically going to be much more than that. Another example is that it looks like I could be nearing "the change" and changing my own child's diapers at the same time. Again, not what I envisioned. There are many other examples of why the passage of time affects my thought process, but I don't want to utter them...

I know this probably sounds very whiny and I don't mean to whine. I probably wouldn't say much if I had a glimmer of some good, promising news regarding this process. The fact is, I don't. Our paperwork is beginning to expire and we're now going through the efforts to renew things, such as a home study which will take place next week. This probably won't be the last time we have to go through the update process, either. Season after season, I pack away Lindy's clothes and shoes and wonder when I will see our next daughter wear these well-cared for hand-me-downs. I used to think it would be late 2009 or early 2010. Now I don't even think it will be in 2011. An online referral predictor calculator tells me we won't receive a referral until September 2015.

Why so long? I just don't know. No one does, except God. While I can't explain the process at all, I do know some things about God. I know His hand is in the process and He has a master plan that is much better than my planning abilities. I also know He is faithful and won't desert me. I know He wants me to be patient and longsuffering and trust Him. He is using this period of waiting to stretch me and cause me to be more reliant on Him. I am not the first person He's put through a period of waiting and I won't be the last.

When I started this blog, I had no idea this journey would be as long as it appears it will be. I very simply intended to journal my feelings, share fun and exciting milestones, and document our journey. When I think about continuing to publicly document my feelings and emotions about this process on a routine basis, it seems kind of scary being so honest and vulnerable. I wouldn't want my disappointments, lack of hope or faith, or discouragement to cause anyone to lose faith in their own personal walk or negatively impact someone who might be considering adoption. I have decided to leave this blog dormant, for now, and forego my monthly posts. If a milestone or something newsworthy occurs, I will most certainly post.

If this is the only blog of mine you read, you are welcome to come visit Lindy's blog or our family blog for more regular, happier posts.

Last but definitely NOT least, I ask that you pray. Please pray for all the families who are traveling the road of adoption. If people aren't sure what to do, how to proceed, whether to wait or change course, I ask that you pray for God to give them wisdom and direction for what is best for each particular circumstance. I also ask for you to pray for the children. There are millions of orphans in this world needing forever families.

Thank you for your love, support, and kindess.

You either do or you don't

2008-09-07T07:20:00.007-05:00

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

I wasn't sure what to write this month. I have a lot swirling around in my mind but I find it all very difficult to write about. Yesterday this verse popped into my head which I believe was a result of the spirit living in me. I love this verse but on this tenth month of being logged in (with NO end in MY sight), I have to admit I am not trusting in the Lord with ALL my heart. I think if I were trusting with ALL my heart, I wouldn't feel so much angst and uncertainty. So, I guess since I'm just sort of trusting in Him in essence it means I'm NOT trusting Him because you either do or don't.

Lord, I ask that you cause me to completely TRUST you. Help me to BELIEVE 100% that you are going to smooth and shorten the path to our daughter by removing the current obstacles in China. I know I'm not in control over anything and that you are in complete control. What seems impossible is possible. I know it isn't at all constructive or healthy for me to fret and worry like I have been these past few months, nor does it do a very effective job of acknowledging you and your power. You know the entire story--beginning to end. Help me to trust that it is a beautiful story with a very happy ending. In your son's name I pray, Amen.

Not about to pop...

2008-08-07T09:09:00.004-05:00

We've all seen the lady whose belly is so big with a baby (or babies) that she literally looks like she's going to pop. From the little I know, in that ninth month of pregnancy amazing and bizarre things happen to the expectant mother and her unborn child. The wait, which has seemed eternal, is almost over and soon, God-willing, a healthy child will come into this world. For most, it is an exciting time, a scary time, and an emotional time...

Today we have been officially "paper pregnant" for our second child for nine months. Nine months and I am not even close to popping! These are indeed emotional times for me. This month I have felt like I've had the hormones of a full-term pregnant woman. I am scared. I am uncertain. I am worried. I am struggling. I am impatient. I am losing hope. I also know I am not alone.

As often is the case, I seek guidance and comfort from the Psalms...Here is what comforted me today.

"Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord..." Psalm 27:14

Yes, Lord, I will wait...

Eight in '08

2008-07-07T05:55:00.000-05:00

Today we've been logged in eight months for our next daughter. It amazes me to think we were logged in about eight and a half months before we got our referral for Lindy. While that wait seemed eternal, it is nothing compared to what we are facing to bring home this child.

There are days when I wish I could hold an object like a Magic 8-ball and ask it to give me an answer as to when we'll receive a referral or peer into a crystal ball to see us holding our daughter for the first time. However, I don't put my faith or trust in Magic 8-balls, crystal balls, or anything else but God. I trust that He knows all the answers that swirl around in my head and know He will reveal them in His perfect timing.

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me..." John 14:1

Lucky seven

2008-06-07T06:51:00.002-05:00

Make the least of all that goes and the most of all that comes. Don't regret what is past. Cherish what you have. Look forward to all that is to come. And most important of all, rely moment by moment on Jesus Christ.

Gigi Graham Tchividjian

Celebrating seven months down!!!

The six month blues...

2008-05-07T07:19:00.005-05:00

Today we have been logged in six months. I have to admit it doesn't seem like a month has passed since I wrote the last post, so that is good news, in some way.

While we waited to bring Lindy home and as we've been waiting so far, the question, "why so long?" often comes up in conversation. The truth is, there are probably many factors. Many people think the massive preparation efforts for the Olympics in Beijing caused the severe slow down. In some ways it makes sense, but lately I am hearing that really isn't the main issue. I kind of wish it was because the Olympics begin in less than 100 days. It'd be nice to think that life in China will return to normal once they are over and wait times will significantly decrease.

It also appears our friend the economy might be impacting things. The dollar isn't as strong in China as it once was. I'll leave it at that and not say more because I don't like to think of bringing our daughter home in terms of profits and losses.

There are many other things I am sure that are impacting the situation. The one thing I need to hold onto is and remember is that God is in control and can impact the situation in a greater way than anything or anybody else.

I ran across the following quote and it reminds me to not be idle and to make the most of the journey...

"This time like all times is a very good one if we but know what to do with it."

--Ralph Waldo Emerson

It's that time of the month...

2008-04-07T15:43:00.003-05:00

Cinq, funf, cinco, cinque, wu. Whatever language you speak, the progress is the same--we've been logged in five months today.

Here are just five things I am praying for regarding this situation:

1. I pray God will bless us with a happy, healthy, beautiful daughter.

2. I pray God will MOVE mountains and significantly speed up the process so thousands of children will meet their forever families.

3. I pray God chooses healthy biological parents for our child and that He comforts them during the difficult process of choosing to give up a child.

4. I pray God will help me enjoy the journey.

5. I pray as I bring these requests to God that my faith is strong, evident, and pleasing to Him.

"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. " James 5: 13-16

For my friends who are waiting, I am praying for you, too. Thank you to everyone who prays on our behalf. It is a source of comfort.

God knows...

2008-03-28T13:42:00.006-05:00

A few people have asked whether Lindy's mei mei has a name. We have not chosen a name for her at this point and, honestly, we haven't even talked about it much. We do have some names on the table but we definitely aren't even close to a final selection and it appears we don't need to have one for quite a while. Every once in a while we'll ask Lindy what her mei mei's name is and she says, "Mei mei."

There is someone who does know her name and that is God. Today I have been thinking about God's omniscience. My dwelling on that really comes from a sad little thing that happened yesterday. In the late afternoon I heard a terrible crash into the window. I looked out to see a mourning dove which had fallen to the ground and within seconds it died. I remembered that the Bible talks about how God even knows when a sparrow falls to the ground...

It really is so hard as a human to fathom that God knows who this little one's birth parents will be, when she'll come into this world, what her Chinese name will be, what we will name her, and when we will meet her for the first time. It gives me peace knowing that someone has the answers, though, even when I don't.

"He counts the number of the stars; he calls them all by name." Psalm 147:4

"For he looks to the ends of the earth, and sees everything under the heavens." Job 28:24

There's traffic up ahead, folks...

2008-03-07T08:09:00.009-06:00

Last night before I drifted off to sleep one of the big topics on the news was how our city will be undergoing MORE road construction, thus leading to more congestion and traffic headaches...This morning as I was listening to the news, yet another major road was about to be closed and the anchor warned of longer wait times and kindly recommended drivers check for alternate routes.

I breathed a sigh of relief that I no longer have to battle long, hectic, crazy commutes to and from work. I wasn't fond of it at the time and I know I wouldn't be fond of it now. In this instant gratification society, most people don't like to wait. In a lot of ways, we don't even know how to wait. During major traffic inconveniences I felt angst, I didn't look for ways to take the lemon and make it lemonade. It was a hassle plain and simple.

Today our paperwork has been logged in four months. Considering all the traffic ahead of us, we have a very long commute left. We don't like it but that's the situation. We chose the road we are traveling. We heard the warnings of the traffic reporters but got on the road anyway. We will keep plugging away mile marker by mile marker until we reach our destination--our next daughter...

Instead of feeling angst and frustration, I need to look for ways to enjoy the commute. I have some ways in mind but would love to hear your thoughts as well...

As always, thank you for your prayers!

Another month down

2008-02-07T10:42:00.000-06:00

Back when we started the process to bring Lindy home, we thought three months would be the halfway point until we received our referral; however, that was not the case.

I can't even begin to speculate how much longer we have to go. All I know is that each day is one day closer until we have another daughter.

Please pray big prayers for us. While you are praying, please pray for the people of China who have been devastated by snow and ice the past few days. Imagine a nor'easter hitting Cancun. Orphanages are operating without electricity, water, and are running out of basic supplies. Having seen a glimpse inside a "premier" orphanage, I cannot imagine the scene inside the orphanages given these severe situations. For us, it is heartwrenching...

If you're checking this blog from time to time, thank you! You are an encouragement to us.

Making it feel real

2008-01-24T11:59:00.000-06:00

"All children come from God, for some the journey home just takes a little longer. "

Author Unknown

During the holidays we received a couple of packages for our next little girl. These expressions of generosity made this adoption feel more "real."

Here Lindy is showing off a fun toy for her mei mei.

We also got a fantastic box of some darling next to new clothes from a special friend of mine. It was so much fun unwrapping each piece and dreaming of our next daughter wearing them.

Thank you, friends, for your thoughtfulness!

Two month "LID"versary

2008-01-07T12:33:00.000-06:00

We have to take joy in the milestones--no matter how small they are.

Personal pep talk

2007-12-13T14:43:00.000-06:00

I think a lot of people take time to think about the past during the holidays. It is natural to think about special memories, remember someone who is no longer living, and consider the many ways life has changed.

Last year I spent time thinking about how our life had changed from 2005 to 2006 with the addition of Lindy. I documented some of my feelings in this post. That post was meant to encourage my friends who were so discouraged and disappointed that they hadn't brought home their special family member. They were struggling and oh how I could empathize. Thankfully, most of the friends I wrote this for have their sweet children and are experiencing joy beyond measure. Congratulations Di, Jill, and Shauna! Also, I couldn't be happier for you Heather and Kim. Even though I didn't know you last year, I know it was a disappointing Christmas for you and your families, as well. This Christmas, though, will be magical for all of you!!!

Now, I must read the words I wrote and BELIEVE them all over again. I do. I know God has a plan and purpose. I hold to that. I see it everyday when I look into Lindy's eyes and hold her close to me. Although I don't think we will have our daughter in 2008 or 2009, I know God knows when it will happen and that gives me peace.

The proverbial clock is now on

2007-12-07T15:50:00.000-06:00

Today I was getting antsy. It has been more than a month since we were DTC, so I emailed our social worker to find out if she'd heard anything about a log-in-date (LID). I didn't really want to do that because I have prided myself on being the "calm client" who flies under the radar and shows full faith the agency will let us know when there is something to report. However, I did it anyway. Ironically, I got this email this afternoon:

Dear Families,

Congratulations! We have your log-in date (LID) today and the exact date is 11/7/07. As of now we are seeing the wait time to be about 25 months from LID to referral. You can find more updated information on the CCAA website.

I hope this finds you well and congratulations on accomplishing another milestone in your adoption journey!

Honestly, I had hoped our LID would be in October but it really matches our experience with Lindy--DTC 4/15/05 and LID 5/9/05. Our LID with Lindy was around her birthday (unbeknownst to us at the time) but, sadly, we're pretty sure our next daughter wasn't born in 2007 and have doubts she'll even be born in 2008.

Nonetheless, this is not a time to be melancholy and ultra-reflective. It is a happy post for now we know the "clock" is on and we are "officially" waiting and the date on the calendar tells me we're one month down.

Please pray big prayers for us and all the other waiting families. We sure could use them!

Phew...that was close

2007-11-08T10:29:00.000-06:00

Yesterday we got an email from our agency with the subject line "Good News." Here is an excerpt:

"...I am very happy to tell you that you are officially a DTC (dossier to China) family…congratulations! Your dossier was sent to China on October 30, 2007."

Yikes! I thought the good news was going to be our LID. Well, I immediately sent a note back to ensure our dossier had been mailed on October 16th and not the 30th. It was. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal but EVERY single day counts in this process.

So we wait...

The good news and the bad news

2007-10-16T13:51:00.000-05:00

Good afternoon~

We just got an email from our social worker letting us know we are officially DTC today. DTC is an acronym for dossier to China. In essence, it means our dossier is leaving our adoption agency and being forwarded to the CCAA (China Center for Adoption Affairs) in China. We are thrilled of this news.

So, what now? Oh how we wish the news was good. Quite frankly, it is beyond discouraging. Once the CCAA receives our dossier, they will log it in. That log-in-date (LID) is what starts the clock for us. Right now the wait between LID and referral is approximately 24 months. That timeframe could increase or decrease but the wait has been increasing for quite a while now.

Here's a little background to give you an idea of how slow things have gotten. On April 15, 2005 (2.5 years ago and one day) our dossier was sent to China for Lindy. Our LID was May 9, 2005, our referral date was January 25, 2006, and we met her on April 3, 2006. We waited 8.5 months for a referral. Believe it or not, the CCAA is still processing dossiers from 2005. They are FINALLY into December 2005 LIDs. In the 18 months we've had Lindy, a little over 6 months of paperwork has been processed.

Why so long? That is the question often posed to us. That remains a great mystery and we don't think we'll ever know the answer during this lifetime. There are probably several reasons that the wait has increased so significantly.

As crass and awful as it sounds, a lot of it boils down to basic economic principles of supply and demand. In other words, there are more people waiting to adopt than there are available children. Now that doesn't mean there are only a few children in the orphanages--there are thousands. However, so many (NOT ALL) of prospective adoptive parents are requesting non-special needs children who are as young as possible and these days there just aren't as many. That could mean more biological parents are keeping their children--no matter the gender, it could mean they are opting to pay the steep fines to have more than one child, it could mean there are more special needs children, and, sadly, abortion could be on the rise. There are some other reasons such as many of the orphanages don't participate in international adoption and children are being given away to family members rather than being abandoned.

We're torn about how to feel about this. In our hearts, we hate the fact that there are children in any country who are orphans. We don't "wish" for a big surge of healthy abandoned babies in China so that we can finally have our daughter. We know God led us to adopting Lindy and He has led us to China again. So, we will wait...

We believe God can do anything. We believe in his power and might. While we don't have the answers or know the reason behind the delays, we know He does. Our prayer is that God will affect some change in China and allow for this process to speed up by leaps and bounds. We know He can do it if it His will. We pray for all the children and for all the waiting families that it is His will. We ask you to join us in that prayer, as well.

We also petition your prayers for our patience and for us to remain faithful and optimistic about this long journey. There will be discouraging and disappointing days and days where we will question our decision. We know this. Please pray those days will be few and far between and for us to diligently pray for our daughter's birth parents, caretakers, and her overall health and safety.

Thank you with love~

Don & Lisa

We're tickled pink!

2007-10-06T17:23:00.000-05:00

Woohoo!!!
Our dossier is complete and is en route to our agency in New York City. We didn't waste ANY time, yet it still took nearly six months. We are thrilled to have this part of the process behind us. Our social worker will review our documents for accuracy and to ensure everything is complete. Then we hope it won't be too much longer before they forward our dossier to China.

Sadly, because the wait is terribly long right now, many of our documents will expire and we will have to renew them along the way. However, we'll cross those bridges when we get to them. For now, the paperchase is over.

I tied it with a pretty pink bow to remind us we will one day have another daughter.

Don is really the master "paperchaser." He is all about the organizational aspect of it. He takes his profession as a project manager VERY seriously.

The final handoff and last trip to Kinko's for a while. PLEASE be so careful with this package!!! It is our labor of love...

Thank you to everyone who has been part of this chase!

Getting our I-171H notarized

2007-09-26T23:14:00.000-05:00

The day after we received our I-171H, we went to our special friend, Trina's, house. She is a notary public and we were blessed to have her notarize this important document.

Here she is in action...

Thank you soooo much, Trina. We love you!

Happy mail day

2007-09-25T20:09:00.000-05:00

For several days now Lindy and I have been trekking our way to the cluster mailbox in hopes of a receiving a very special envelope. Today Lindy was still down napping and I went out there by myself. I prayed really hard on the short walk that it would be in there and today would be the day. I even forgot it was Tuesday and how Tuesday's mail is usually the WORST--all junk.

To my delight, a big yellow envelope was stuffed in there. I tore it open and sure enough it was our I-171H. This document is the key to finishing our dossier.

Thanks to anyone who has prayed for this document to arrive. All the terminology might not mean a thing to you, but your prayers mean the world to us.

Love,
Don, Lisa, and Lindy

Twiddling our thumbs

2007-08-29T16:18:00.000-05:00

A lot of people are asking where we are in the process...We are waiting.

Currently, we are waiting for our I-171H. This is a form that we HAVE to have from immigration to proceed with an international adoption. Once we get this form, we will scramble to have the remainder of our documents authenticated by the Texas Secretary of State and Chinese Consulate. Then we will send our completed dossier to our agency for them to review and eventually send to China.

The "clock" isn't even turned on for us yet. We're not in line. We're not on China's radar. This is going to be a really, really LONG haul.

Our most specific prayer request is that we will see this oh so important document in our mailbox SOON!

Thanks,

D, L, & L

Clipart from Clipartheaven.com

Happy Sister's Day

2007-08-05T13:55:00.000-05:00

"A sister is God's way of proving He doesn't want us to walk alone." --Unknown

Not only is today Friendship Day but it is also Sister's Day--which seems quite fitting. Although Lindy doesn't quite comprehend it, we tell her she is going to one day have a little sister or mei mei. Occasionally she even talks about her mei mei in China.

As "older" parents we know we won't be around for our girls as long as we might like to be. We're not trying to sound morbid, it is just a plain fact. We know there is often a very special bond between sisters. Our prayer is that Lindy and our next daughter will always share a close relationship together and never feel alone.

So if you have a sister, today would be a great day to tell her just how much she means to you.

Pottery Barn catalog, Dell Computer catalog, I-600A confirmation letter

2007-07-18T20:36:00.000-05:00

If we're playing Jeopardy then my answer is, "What was in The Osborn's mailbox today."

We received confirmation that our I-600A was received and at the very bottom of the letter was a date for our fingerprinting appointment: August 11, 2007 at 9:00 a.m.

I know the adoption jargon doesn't mean a lot to many of you but the bottom line is that it is PROGRESS.

Thank you for your continued prayers!

A special delivery

2007-07-10T20:19:00.000-05:00

Yea for the FedEx man!!! He left a nice little surprise on our doorstep yesterday--our completed homestudy. This means we can file paperwork with U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) a part of the Department of Homeland Security. Once they process our paperwork, they will send us an appointment to be fingerprinted and process more forms. Please pray it won't take long for us to get the appointment to be fingerprinted. Luckily, that is done here in San Antonio and we don't have to travel far to get that done.

In the meantime, we have a stack of paperwork ready to be notarized and that'll done within the next few days.

"The egg of a bird hatches only when the chick within is ready."--Liam Williams

It is a long time before our chick will be ready, but we pray for patience each step of the way...

Doing the happy dance

2007-06-27T15:27:00.000-05:00

Hooray! Amy emailed the homestudy for our review yesterday. We looked it over, sent back a few minor corrections, and hopefully she'll make the edits pronto.

Every moment counts, so we don't want to waste any time.

Not much else to report...Just hoping to forge ahead.

Two steps forward

2007-06-25T14:47:00.000-05:00

We are happy to announce last Thursday we made some progress on the adoption front!

First, we entertained our social worker, Amy Curtis, for our homestudy. We first met Amy back on December 15, 2004. Back then we answered about four hours worth of questions about our life together, our families, our childhood, our hopes, dreams, and expectations. It was the most intimate and frank conversation we'd ever had with a "stranger."

This time, Amy only had a few questions for us and we just provided her with updated information about our finances, health, and families. It was a snap. To make things even better, Lindy was on near perfect behavior. What a relief!

After the homestudy, we darted off to the main police station in downtown San Antonio to get our criminal background checks. I was kind of dreading this...Last time when we explained what we needed and why the clerk looked at us like we were speaking a foreign language. Surely, we weren't the first couple to ever adopt in San Antonio and require a pretty simple document. From the looks we got, you would have thought we were. This time, however, there were no weird looks, no odd questions, and amazingly it was a seamless transaction.

We have a few more things to assemble for the dossier but the completed homestudy is the key to being able to move forward with some big steps of the process. Please pray we get it back for review from Amy very soon!

There may not be a lot of updates on this blog but please know we truly appreciate your comments, prayers, and encouragement as we travel this very long road.

Movin' along...

2007-06-05T15:58:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we got a call from Amy, a Gladney social worker, to schedule our homestudy. She's flying in from Forth Worth on June 21st to come visit us. Yea!!! Amy completed our first homestudy when we were doing the paperwork for Lindy and we loved her! She made us feel so comfortable with the process and even gave accounts of visiting with people who had barn animals inside the home.

The homestudy is a big part of the process and once it is complete, we'll be able to work on the other vital components of our dossier.

Progress is being made. It may be at a snail's pace but slowly but surely it will all come together so that we can one day bring mei mei home.

The application is complete...we think

2007-05-22T08:46:00.000-05:00

Today Don left the house with an extra special package--the completed application for mei mei. He will be sending this to our agency in New York City today and it should be in their hands sometime this week.

While this is a big milestone, the application is just the beginning of the paperwork we need to complete. It included financial statements, birth certificates, our marriage certificate, medical exams, proof of health insurance, reference letters, pictures of our house and family, criminal records, among other documents and a big fat check.

Some people ask will the process be easier or quicker because we've done this before? No, no, no. We do everything from scratch. It may be a touch easier because we are familiar with the process; however, things change so we don't want to get lax when completing the paperwork. Attention to detail is CRITICAL!

Now what??? We wait to get approved and hopefully our homestudy will be scheduled within the next few weeks. In the meantime we hope we can begin knocking out other paperwork for the dossier which is the packet of paperwork that will eventually be sent to China.

A big thank you to our dear friend, John Skipworth, for coming to our doctor's office yesterday, enduring the almost 90 minute wait, and notarizing a big stack of documents. We can't thank you enough for your help and flexibility.

We'll keep adding updates as we hit milestones...Thanks for praying for us as we race to get everything completed.

A letter

2007-05-13T08:12:00.000-05:00

My dear daughter,

Although I feel confident you haven't been physically conceived, you have been emotionally conceived. Right now you are a tiny little seed that has been planted in my heart. As your daddy and I complete each new piece of paperwork, you grow just a bit more in my heart and that brings me one step closer to you. One day, we will bring you home and you will complete our family.

It is a long time before I will ever see your face or hold you for the first time. I take comfort in knowing God will be watching you all the time while I can't. He knows all about what will happen and when...

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

On Mother's Day, I want you to know you are in my heart and I love you a little bit more each day!

Love,

Mommy

Welcome!

2007-04-24T16:55:00.000-05:00

The Chinese characters 妹妹 represent the words mei mei, which means "little sister." On this blog we will chronicle our journey to bring Lindy's mei mei home.

It is likely to be a longer journey than our journey to bring home Lindy. While this seems unfathomable and discouraging, we also believe in the words found in James 5:16: "The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."

We enlist you as prayer warriors to help make this a smooth process and thank you for accompanying us on this special journey.